I am currently in Starbucks, and I am supposed to be studying for my last final. But I honestly have no motivation when I know all 100 questions she is going to ask. My World Lit final was pretty close to torturous. I am praying for a miracle, so that my GPA doesn't go down the tubes. Otherwise the rest of the finals were tolerable and over with.
Yesterday at lunch Taylar and I spent some time reflecting on this past year, and I was so humbled by all of the things that have happened. I think junior year was probably the best/hardest year so far. Some of the major points that stuck out in my head...
Family. This school year has not been the easiest for my family. We have all been through a lot and there has been hospitalizations, ER visits, surgeries, and endless medication changes. However, God has been so sovereign through the whole process, and I truly think we have all grown closer through it all.
Staff. Oh those girls. I have been so blessed by them. They have been so patient with me this year as I have been on my up and down roller coaster ride. They know how to make me laugh and how to make me cry even when I don't want to. Their honesty, depth, and desire for vulnerability has challenged me, frustrated me, and humbled me all at the same time. They have made this year so memorable, and I am so privileged to have seen them grow over the past few months. They are all such beautiful women that I often feel undeserving to call my friends.
Taylar Camacho. Goodness what a gift. I really feel like God knew what He was doing (well He always does but especially with this) when He put us in the same classes last semester. I have loved growing with Taylar academically, spiritually, and just in life. She has seen me at pretty much all points this semester - sobbing when my dad was going into the hospital and I had midterms and didn't know what to do, stressing over tests that should not have that much of a hold in my life, acting like a freak when I have more energy than I know what to do with, and when I just spend hours processing my life she always listens and not once complained. It is such a true friendship that I know is going to last for a long time. I love her to death.
Benjamin Jeffrey McClure - That boy. Talk about a roller coaster. I had no idea at the beginning of this year that I would end up dating him - or anyone if we wanted to be honest with ourselves. However, I am so grateful that we had those numerous conversations and months of prayer. I am grateful that Ben has been so patient with me and my fears and emotions. I have grown so much from this relationship so far, and I am excited to see the growth that is going to come for both of us.
Kenya - I am going to Kenya in like three weeks. That is another thing that has completely caught me off guard. I had no plans or intentions of going on a mission trip, and I am confident that God wanted me to go to Africa. It was so evident through the application process and through the financial planning. Although I still have some fears, I am getting more excited. I know it will be good.
These are just a few things. There are so many areas of my life that I have felt God's hand in this year. There have been so many wounds that I have had to rehash and memories I have reflected on that have made it a slightly painful process, but the pain has led to something so good. I have felt the maturity that has taken place, and I truly feel like I will be pulling out of the North Hall parking lot in a week a changed person from who I was on August 14, 2011. All by God's grace, love, and sovereignty.